Celebrity Alert

Lordy Miss Maudy. Pamela Anderson was never going to be the meringue dress kinda gal, but she could have had a little decency. The High Priestess of Silicone wore nothing more than a couple of bikinis and some dodgy looking hotpants to her weddings in St Tropez (yes, the Cote d'Azur just plunged to new depths of tack) and some courthouse in the US.

And yet, despite the obvious show of, well, almost everything, there still remain questions unanswered. How did the courthouse let her get away with it? Having married Tommy "King Dong" Lee in a bikini (Pam was wearing the bikini, not Tommy, obviously), I wonder if she recycled her wedding outfit? And, what on earth did she choose as a going-away outfit?

There was a time when a future bride's biggest worry on her wedding day was whether she could carry off virginal white without the congregation laughing, rather than whether she needed a Brazilian before the wedding photos. Apparently, the bride wore white (ha) and wore Jimmy Choo shoes, though I'm not convinced anyone was looking at that particular pair. And no need to worry that Poppa Anderson had to shell out for a couture gown on his daughter's big day - a couple of bucks at WalMart's slapper beachwear section should have done the trick.