Celebrity Alert

Hurray, it's nearly Emmy time, and the merry-go-round of award show / celeb fests has started. So, just time for a couple of hints from us before the weekend.

1. Underwear. Wear it. Stick it. Don't flash it. Check the colour. See exhibit A (left), Ellen Pompeo, the poor man's Renee, who bleats through Grey's Anatomy yet remains able to hook McDreamy, McSteamy and McVet (beyotch). Ellen's not overly blessed in the breast department. A good underwired bra would have whisked those puppies chinward, where they belong. Right: Exhibit B, Isla Fisher, who spent her teens in Aussie soap Home & Away before filming The Wedding Crasher, with broken-nosed sex god Owen Wilson. Bra is in place, but sadly, it's the wrong kind and colour. A nude coloured Calvin Klein barely-there should have done her just fine. We'll leave the paisley pillowcase comments for later. Remember, if in doubt, resort to double-sided tit tape, with corn plasters to prevent nipple protrusion (ick).